Hiding behind things

May 8th '14 13:43 PM
There is this thing that I do and I've been trying to quit doing it. I always hide behind things. When I sit on the couch I always grab a throw pillow. Other times I'll keep my purse on my lap in front of me.

I've been so self-conscious ever since I put on weight and I am always trying to hide it. It's not like holding a pillow in front of me is going to mysteriously make people think I am thinner.

I am trying to be more comfortable in the body that I have and it does get easier as I lose weight. I've never told that to anyone before. Maybe I can break this habit.
May 8th '14 20:36 PM
It is a breakable habit, but it's hard to break! I've always done it too and even now, I'll cross my arms if I have to sit down in public cos I'm conscious of the rolls that appear when I do

I've had to work a lot on my confidence, I realised that if I stand slouched, with my shoulders hunched trying to shrink away, I actually look bigger than if I adopt my mums motto of "shoulders back and TTTF" (tits to the front )
May 9th '14 00:47 AM
Ah Jean, I do this too and I think in my case I just didn't feel comfortable in my clothes. Even when I was skinny I would do it because in my mind my stomach does not look good. Which is silly of me really I know but it's hard to break something you've done for a long time.
May 9th '14 12:35 PM
Good luck. I find myself doing this from time to time. I feel more comfortable in big clothing. I wear a sweater at work over my work clothes. It just makes me feel more comfy. I think it is all about trying to hide too.
May 9th '14 14:08 PM
I think it slowly takes time. I have done this before at my heaviest and I very clearly remember doing this within a family photo during a vacation. That was also the vacation where I decided I was going to stop being lazy about my weight. Sometimes its motivation!
May 9th '14 15:17 PM
I know that when most people look you over that they are mostly not even really thinking about it or they are just looking at what you're wearing. To me, though, it feels like they are looking at me sitting there being fat. I guess I try to avoid that feeling of being judged. It is probably mostly in my head but there are people that do that and it makes me uncomfortable.